The Groom

David Richard Schneider
In his enduring commitment to employee moral and job satisfaction, Mr. Schneider cautiously accepted his position as Committee Co-Chair with one goal in mind: to keep his new partner, Ms. Bilgic, from becoming Bridezilla.

The Bride

Belen Bilgic
Committee Co-Chair Belen Bilgic reigns over The Merger Event Committee with benevolence and zen, committed to play more, work less and not become Bridezilla.

The Best Man

Dr. Paul Schneider
Born the elder brother of David Schneider, Dr. Paul Schneider has managed to be a guiding light for Apathy Inc. throughout the years. Decades of friendly rivalry and hard lessons, aided by Dr. Schneider's burgeoning skills as a psychologist, have resulted in today's corporate standing. Though Dr. Schneider strove for a slightly more perfect product, he has been heard praising the overall outcome of his investment. Dr. Schneider maintains his status of Older Brother, much to David's chagrin.

The Maid of Honor

Meltem Bilgic
Ms. Bilgic entered into Szazszorszep Enterprises's corporate ladder near the end of its first decade in business. After learning valuable lessons about Avoiding the Monster Pit and Beauty Hurts, she became an invaluable executive for the corporation. She has recently formed her own offshoot company involved in Biology, Conservation and Doing Things the Right Way™, taking to heart the stumbling blocks witnessed while on Szazszorszep Enterprise's Board of Directors.

The Master of Ceremonies

Andre German de la Reza
As a fireman, Mr. De la Reza's crisis management, endurance, and interpersonal relations skills make him the ideal candidate to be The Merger's Master of Ceremonies. His long devotion to Szazszorszep Enterprises has placed him high in the company's infrastructure, and his personal lifestyle has given him understanding of Apathy Inc's company policies. In fact, the only area of dispute between the MC and the two corporations seems to be something about the name of a sailboat, but details on this are still shrouded in mystery.

The Parents of the Groom

Larry & Peggy Schneider
Mr. & Mrs Schneider, having fostered Apathy Inc. through its many phases, have recently sold their controlling shares, while maintaining some of the rights to the patented Travel Technology™ developed by Apathy Inc. during the company's Research & Development years. Today, they spend their days pursuing personal interests and further field-testing Travel Technology™.

The Parents of the Bride

Haluk & Pat Bilgic
Also enjoying their newfound retirement, Mr. & Mrs. Bilgic look back on their years at the helm of Szazszorszep Enterprises with pride and relief. Their years of daily challenges while grooming the young, stubborn future chief executive of Szazszorszep Enterprises have finally paid off, making the gray hair and sleepless nights all worth it. Their future plans include a U.S. Tour and perhaps establishing a Turkish office for the Szazszorszapathy empire.